We’ve ALL been there. At bedtime, it seems there are suddenly dozens of things your kids just realized they HAVE to do right away and there is no way they can go to sleep without those things getting done. From the “I’m thirsty,” to the “My tummy hurts I need to use the bathroom again,” you are sometimes even amazed at how creative your kids have suddenly become at this “magic hour” called bedtime. You’ll get a good chuckle out of this mom’s many steps of getting her kids in bed…on a good night, hahaha!
1. Begin The Countdown to Bedtime warnings at 15 minute intervals, at least two hours before you actually want them in bed.
2. Tell them 10 times each to use the toilet, wash their hands and faces, brush teeth, get PJs on.
3. Threaten to cancel/throw away something — anything — fun if they don’t get in the bathroom RIGHT NOW to use the toilet, wash their hands and faces, brush teeth, get PJs on.
4. While they paint the bathroom in toothpaste and spit, search house for the cherished toys they MUST have in bed in order to sleep, for it is guaranteed each one has been removed from the sacred spots in their bedrooms and are in different corners of different floors of the house.
5. Herd kids to their bedrooms.
6. Watch kids jump on the beds, playing a risky game of Dangerously Uncoordinated at Nighttime Chase.
7. Tell them to JUST CALM DOWN FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS DECENT in the voice that makes the I’m Serious vein bulge in your neck.
8. Hustle the kids into Big Kid’s room.
9. Listen to Big Kid read a book while batting away Little Kid’s constant interruptions with a number of eyebrow-centric threatening looks of deflection.